Seasons Shifting to Ponder

Blessed Beltane to all!

That said, I'm under the weather sick with a sore throat and congested head. Sitting on the couch reviewing blogs and articles while drinking tea and trying to make everything above my shoulders stop hurting was not how I had planned to spend today. Now onto something I did want to do today.

Ever since I was introduced to Paganism and began researching Sabbats and such I noticed that the "accepted" change in seasons here in California (and to some extent Washington State as well) seem to follow the Sabbats, not the Solstices and Equinoxes. What I mean by this is rather then summer starting on June 20/21 like everyone says, I believe it actually starts here around May 1. That's the time that the world really begins to warm up and come fully alive.

This same 6-week push forward of the seasonal changes I have noticed can also be applied to spring, fall and winter as well. Spring always seems to take effect in February, just in time for Imbloc. Winter always comes around the time of Samhain. Fall is the tricky one as the Bay Area experiences an Indian Summer in September and October. However, if I go by the fact that the leaves on the trees start to change colors and it gets a bit blustery in August, fall also fits this pattern.

Additionally it makes more sense tome that the fire festivals are in the summer season and all of the harvest festivals are in the fall season. The dark time of the year should encompass the winter and the return of the light should herald the spring. After all, the Wheel of the Year is supposed to represent the cycle of life, for both us and the God and Goddess, and if we go by the established secular/Christian cycle everything is slightly skewed.

I hope your Beltane brings the warmth of the Sun to you. Blessed Be.

A New Hearth, A New Home

The last few weeks have been a bit busy. I found a new apartment the day after I wrote my last entry and while we're mostly moved in now, some things still need work.

The whole apartment hunting and application process was a huge lesson in faith and trust in the Goddess for me. I know that sounds a little strange in the Craigslist-driven, money revolving world of apartment renting, but it's true for me. I've always been cautious when it comes to putting all my hopes in one basket as they usually fall apart at that point. So when I had only found one decent apartment for every two weeks of searching, I found that focusing my need and asking the Goddess for help getting through the process made a huge difference. I didn't dwell on anything and with the amazing backyard I knew the Goddess wanted me here.

Our first week in the new place also got me talking with the other half about paganism and Heathenism while we were without internet. I knew he was open to my alternative spiritual views, but didn't know he had any interest, even though his interest is limited more to the symbolism, celebrations and lore than a belief system. This makes me really excited to learn and share with him as Heathenism keeps coming up on my spiritual radar as of late.

Another exciting aspect to this new apartment is our backyard. It is shared with the 3 other units in the building, but from what I can tell, no one uses anything more than the patio area. Plus, when we signed the lease the landlord kept saying he wished someone would do something with it. My other half was enamored with the yard from the first site of it and upon exploration we found a planter box that needed a little love. After a few hours and a good session with his dad's rototiller, our planter box now has peppers, tomatoes, garlic and onions growing with basil and marigolds to be added soon. I also found a great spot to turn into a garden altar. I'm so excited to not be confined to an inside spot for my ritual work anymore.

Conquering the planter box.

All in all, this place has a wonderful positive energy to it and I know that the Goddess blessed me with a wonderful new home.

Altars and Sacred Spaces

One thing I have been lacking for the past year and a half is an altar space of my own. I had to give mine up when I moved back in with my parents briefly. They wouldn't have understood and probably would have tried to have me exorcized or something since I had set up an "occult item" in their home. When I came back to California I ended up staying with my boyfriend in his tiny room, and whileI did set up a shrine of sorts on the kitchen table, that table has also been servering as my desk and thus is not as sacred as I'd like it to be.

Now that we are in the process of looking for a new place a live I am excited as this means I will be able to set up an altar again. I keep browsing sites for inspirations and there's quite a few new additions to my Pinterest Pagan board. All of these ideas keep me wondering and thinking about how I want to set up my space when I finally can again.

Online Resources

The internet is an amazing tool for learning about the Pagan path. There are thousands of blogs and videos about almost every topic you can think of. One of my favorite and recently discovered video posters is CharmingPixieFlora on YouTube. (I've linked to a video of hers that hit the spot just now when I was watching it.)

It's interesting to see how other people practice and video allows us to do this. We can share our path with the world and learn from the paths of others. I know she has a new YouTube channel, but I think this channel is more pagan oriented and thus more relevant to my needs.

Learning Focus of the Season

In the magical blogsphere I keep coming across more and more references to Heathenism and
Ásatrú. I know only rudimentary things about who the deities are in that pantheon, but it has me wanting to know more about the traditions of the North. Not saying I'm going to jump ship and start believing in that path, but I think the time is right to learn about it. It's just one more topic to fill my mind with.

On a secondary note, my study of tarot has been slow, but productive. I gave another reading this week and was better able to interpret the cards. It also made me really happy when my boyfriend popped in during the middle and stated how the Tarot is one of the few metaphysical things he actually puts stock in. Score.

Out of the Digital Broom Closet

I just made this blog visible to the public. Kind of nervous, but I feel I owe it to the pagan community to  be a visibly active part of it. Afterall, I am a devoted reader of other blogs and hope that others can learn from my experiences as I have learned from theirs.

This also means I need to overhaul the look of my blog. I had originally intended it to be an exploration of "green witchery," but I find that my path seems to be more of a kitchen witch at the moment. (I currently lack any sort of useable outdoor/green space and seem to always be in the kitchen because that's where my computer lives.)

To anyone who stumbles across my humble little blog, I apologize ahead of time for any spelling errors and hope you enjoy what you find here. Blessed Be.

Going from Maiden to Mother Mode

My house is a bit of a circus. I live with three guys and two cats full time, with a girlfriend, a wee person (one of the guy's three year old daughter) and an Italian Greyhound here half of the time. If the house wasn't entertaining enough with the two cats before hand, well there's never a dull moment now. And it's not a big bouse either. Only two bedrooms and one bath room. At least the living room is rather large as one of the guys lives in it and we still have enough room for everyone to use it as a living room.

The craziness of the living situation has brought me to terms with something I only have a few years left to get started on: motherhood.

I still think of myself as young person but the truth is I'm pushing 30. Not saying 30 is old, but I know that once you pass 35ish the riskier it is to have children of your own. Now I'm not married yet and the other half has stated that he's fine with being an older father. Plus, our career, financial and living situations are not what we would want if we did decide to have children. Several time throughout the last year I've been asked how long we've been married or how many kids we have and most of the time it hasn't made me think twice. But with our 1 year anniversary of being an official couple (long story, but it only took 4 years for that to happen) and the roommate moving in as part of the divorce process from his wife and me getting to help with the little one really has me thinking about kids and what kind of mom I'd be.

There are thing you make note of as you grow up of what you do and do not want to repeat with your kids. Despite my normal adversion to children I have been keeping a list of my own. I know I want my kids to be in Scouts (both Boy Scouts and Girl Scouts) as I like the opportunities my brother and I had as a result of being involved with them. I'd like to get my kids into wall climbing and maybe yoga. (Talk about cool physical activities that don't make you feel like you suck because you can never hit the ball when at bat!) I also know that I don't want to force a specific religion on my children. Rather I want to expose them to a variety of belief systems and teach them to decide and choose for themselves. However, I know that I want to observe pagan celebrations and involve them in it.

Yes, that is forcing a specific set of religious beliefs on them, but I feel that the pagan wheel of the year lines up better with secular seasonal observances than anything else. Plus the Wheel of the year is a great way to teach kids about the seasons and introduce them to different activities associated with each. And helping my roommate celebrate the holidays with his daughter is making me want one of my own. I know I'm not ready to pass into the cycle of life where one enters the aspect of the Mother from that of the Maiden, but life seems to be telling me it's time.

What's in a Book of Shadows?

Something I have been wanting to do for quite some time is create my own Book of Shadows. I have many books on my shelf that I use as resources, but I wanted my own book that kept all of the knowledge, rituals, spells, etc that I use in one easy to find place. I actually started making my own a year ago or so. I got a non-descript black book and wrote down the 'Charge of the Goddess' and the 'Witches Reede.' I felt these were good starting points to start my BoS off with. However, from there I am not sure how to proceed. How do I want to organize my BoS? What should I put in it? How do I factor in room for things that I have yet to learn and may wish to include at a later time?

To help me plan and undertake this endeavor I turned to the internet. I found may great sites talking about the ordering, layout, and creation of your BoS, but relatively little about the exact information mentioned in a BoS. As a solitary and someone still learning the pagan ways, being able to see what is inside someone else's BoS word for word would be extremely helpful.

I had bookmarked the Internet Sacred Text Archive over a year ago when I first did research for how to make a BoS, but I had never really looked into it that much until today. with little effort I was able to find both the Internet Book of Shadows and the Gardenieran Book of Shadows. Both are full text copies and in 12pt Verdana the IBoS is 447 pages long in MS Word. So now I have a lot of material to review.

A Hallowed Eve

My Cat-o-Lantern

This year I have felt a strong yearning to participate in Samhain rituals and observances. I've felt it very keenly for the past few weeks, even before my move. I think it is a way of my spirit telling me that it needs to realign itself with the natural world and start the new year with a grounded perspective. As a result I've been doing some Samhain research and looking for ways I can celebrate it in my highly Catholic parents' house without offending my mom who blames people falling away from the Church as a result of "new age" and "occult" ideas. I already had to fend her off years ago and try as I might  I have yet to properly educate her on the differences between "new age," "occult" and "paganism."

My ideas so far are consisting of:

• a private ritual in my room this evening
• baking pumpkin bread as a celebration of the harvest
• placing candles in my window to guide spirits on their way
• offering apple cider
• scrying, tarot reading and/or runecasting
• making incense or bath salts for the sabbat

I would love to dress up, but I don't have a costume and my silly stupid game has an event I'm hosting at 7pm tonight. That and I told we don't get many trick-or-treaters around here so I'm not too sure of what will be going on around here this evening.

Whatever your plans for Samhain are I hope you fair well this hallowed eve.

A Sign?

A really cool thing happened. The day after I arrived in my new town (Anacortes, WA) the local paper had an article about a pagan group in the next town over, Forest Moon Grove. I found this a bit of a sign that I'm supposed to be here. Here was an article about paganism and active pagans in my new home. Granted there's not much on their page, but it's definitely something for me to look into and get involved with. My parents are highly involved with the Catholic church here so not sure how open they would be if I did get involved wit this group. First I have to let them in on my pagan leanings and see how well that goes over.

Spiritual Identity

It's the middle of summer and I've been feeling a strong connection to the element of fire this year. (Last year summer brought a strong connection to the element of water for me.) I began the day by looking for a list of fire dieties as I have yet to feel a connection to a particular Lady and Lord and thought my strong connections to the fire element might be a good starting round for a meditation point after some research. While I failed to find a list that I was looking for, I did come across serveral articles on Witchvox that spoke to me about what it is and isn't to be a Pagan or Witch.

I still consider myself in a learning stage of the Pagan and Witch traditions rather and a devoted follower. I do feel strong connections to various elements and feel a connection to the Goddess within my soul. I know I am on the correct path. This is not something I question. But aside from a few close friends I am reluctant to tell anyone how I feel about religion and the spiritual path that speaks to me. It is good to know that I am not alone. I consider myself a fairly "normal" person. Normal being subjective, but I'm well educated, amibitious, I don't dress out of the ordinary, and am respectful of those I am around. I do feel a yearning to be freer than I am in many ways, but out of respect for my family I hold myself in check. I don't want preconceived notions and incorrect assumptions to hinder my path in life. I want to live peacefully and follow my own path. I don't think that's too much to ask or too much of others to allow you to do.